I don’t know what’s going on with me, but I stink more and more each day! I have lost so much hair on my underbelly, it looks like Dog the Bounty Hunter’s chest. Mom keeps telling me to hang on until Monday, I guess I’m going to see the doctor. I feel skankier than Paris Hilton's new BFF. Enough about me, as if anyone could ever get enough of me, I was watching TV with dad the other night, when the craziest show ever, came on! It was called “S*&# My Dad Says.” Really? We've reduced ourselves to this? What’s next? Poops on my butt, Gunk in my ear, The Bunnies Peed on my Head, My underbelly is red and itchy? Oh wait, I wasn’t going to talk about me anymore. The show was about as entertaining as watching the furball sing the National Anthem for a treat! Get away you hillbilly, man, I just typed the word treat, and he was on me like Whoopi on a chicken wing! Supposedly, the show was started by some guy who was tweeting S*&# his dad said. Well, if they can put some hotel room salesman to work on a show with this concept, I’m smelling a new show in my future! How about Shitzu CSI, or, Paw and Order! I could play myself, they need someone with spunk on TV these days! They’d have to find someone free spirited to play the little hippie girl! A real looker to play mom! I wonder if that Harry Potter actor is out of work yet? He could play the boy they call Wyatt. We could make it an action thriller and have Keenu Reeves play dad! Of course, we’d have to find someone, or, some thing, to play the furball. I wonder if that Alf character is still in the business? If I don’t get this itching under control soon, we may have to call the show; The Young and the Itchy, or, how about the Mold and the Beautiful! Gotta run, mom’s coming at me with another syringe full of happy juice!