I just don’t know how much longer I can hang on. Dad stopped taking me out to do my “business” while he tends to those free tinkling rabbits! It’s been two days since my last fix! I can’t keep anything down, I have the shakes. Hello, my name is Princess, and I’m hooked on poop! Hush little puppy, don’t say a word, mama’s gonna buy you a rabbit turd! I can’t take it! I’m cracking up! Okay, must remain calm, I’m sure one of those four legged poop dispensers is going to come through any minute. All I have to do is wait for a little spillage over the side of the hutch, and bingo! I’m back in the game! Let this be a lesson for all of you out there thinking about getting hooked. Sure, the pushers all act like your friend at first! Come on under the hutch, enjoy our magical droppings, it’s free, they say. Then, once you’re under there, they treat you like you’re David Hasselhoff on the bathroom floor searching for your dignity! I don’t care how many times mom bathes me, I just can’t stop feeling dirty. Must remain strong, if not for me, then, who I am I kidding, it’s all about me!